58 Things to do in an Elevator
1. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
2. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
3. Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
4. Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor you're on.
5. Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
6. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
7. Swat at flies that don't exist.
8. Call out, "Group hug!", then enforce it.
9. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
10. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
11. Make race car noises when people get on and off.
12. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your Kleenex to the other passengers.
13. Grimace painfully while slapping your forehead and muttering "Shut up! All of you just shut up!"
14. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a small world" incessantly.
15. Sell Girl Scout cookies.
16. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
17. Shave.
18. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peeking inside ask "Got enough air in there?"
19. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
20. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
21. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
22. Lean over to another passenger and whisper "Enjoying the ride?"
23. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you "Admiral".
24. Burp!
25. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
26. Do Tai Chi exercises.
27. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while and then announce: "I've got new socks on".
28. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back, "Oh not now! stupid motion sickness!"
29. Give religious tracts to each passenger.
30. Meow occasionally.
31. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter into your nose.
32. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
33. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continuously pushing buttons.
34. Holler "Chutes Away!" whenever the elevator descends.
35. Walk on with a cooler that says "Human Head" on the side.
36. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of them!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
37. Leave a box between the doors.
38. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
39. Wear a hand puppet and talk to the other passengers "through" it.
40. Start a sing-a-long.
41. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "Is that your beeper?"
42. Play the accordion.
43. Shadow box.
44. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
45. Lean against the button panel.
46. Say, "I wonder what all these do?" and then push ALL the red buttons.
47. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
48. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space".
49. Bring a chair along.
50. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger, "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"
51. Blow spit bubbles.
52. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
53. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."
54. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
55. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
56. Wear "X-ray Specs" and leer at other passengers.
57. Stare at your thumb and say, "I think it's getting bigger."
58. If anyone touches you, recoil fiercely and scream, "BAD TOUCH!"
1. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
2. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
3. Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
4. Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor you're on.
5. Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
6. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
7. Swat at flies that don't exist.
8. Call out, "Group hug!", then enforce it.
9. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
10. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
11. Make race car noises when people get on and off.
12. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your Kleenex to the other passengers.
13. Grimace painfully while slapping your forehead and muttering "Shut up! All of you just shut up!"
14. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a small world" incessantly.
15. Sell Girl Scout cookies.
16. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
17. Shave.
18. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peeking inside ask "Got enough air in there?"
19. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
20. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
21. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
22. Lean over to another passenger and whisper "Enjoying the ride?"
23. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you "Admiral".
24. Burp!
25. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
26. Do Tai Chi exercises.
27. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while and then announce: "I've got new socks on".
28. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back, "Oh not now! stupid motion sickness!"
29. Give religious tracts to each passenger.
30. Meow occasionally.
31. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter into your nose.
32. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
33. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continuously pushing buttons.
34. Holler "Chutes Away!" whenever the elevator descends.
35. Walk on with a cooler that says "Human Head" on the side.
36. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of them!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
37. Leave a box between the doors.
38. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
39. Wear a hand puppet and talk to the other passengers "through" it.
40. Start a sing-a-long.
41. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "Is that your beeper?"
42. Play the accordion.
43. Shadow box.
44. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
45. Lean against the button panel.
46. Say, "I wonder what all these do?" and then push ALL the red buttons.
47. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
48. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space".
49. Bring a chair along.
50. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger, "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"
51. Blow spit bubbles.
52. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
53. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."
54. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
55. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
56. Wear "X-ray Specs" and leer at other passengers.
57. Stare at your thumb and say, "I think it's getting bigger."
58. If anyone touches you, recoil fiercely and scream, "BAD TOUCH!"